Barbie Gull
Once again, the vocal stylings of Emma…
United Steaks of America
Emma Said: Rainbow Puppies
Random conversation with my middle child, Emma, who is four-years-old and sweeter than actual sugar.
Emma: Momma, do you wike puppies?
Me: Sure.
(All of you people who know I hate animals SHUDDUP!)
Emma: Hmmm. Do you wike kittens?
Me: Of course.
(Seriously. Be quiet.)
Emma: Which is yuh pay-bor-it Momma?
Me: I don’t know… puppies I guess? What’s your favorite?
Emma: (Like she was WAITING for me to ask) WAINBOW puppies AND WAINBOW kittens!!
Ah, Emma. If we could all live a day in your red Mary Jane’s the world would be a better place.
Emma Said: I’ve Got Moves
Random convo on the way home from the grocery store (where I’m pretty sure I saw Fantasia Barrino.)
Emma: I’ve got wots of moves Momma.
Me: You do?
Emma: Yep, I’ll show you when we get home. I’ve got wots of kah-wat-ee moves but I don’t know how to beat a mummy….you know, they have special pah-wahs….
I know how to beat a MOMMY, toss a chocolate bar into a padded cell and lock the door after she dive rolls into the room.
Emma Said: Butter My Buns
Last weekend my mother saw a t-shirt that read, “Butter my buns and call me a biscuit.” She read it to Aubrey and they laughed about it. Since then, Aubrey has tried a million times to use it appropriately in conversation but she’s not really sure how.
It’s very similar to trying to teach her about proper “Jinx, buy me a Coke!” etiquette, which Aubrey thinks means you agree with someone. It’s her version of “Amen!” “Me too!” “I second that!” “Right on, Sister!” Aubrey also likes to yell, “Jinx, buy me a Coke!” while everyone is singing in the car… which is just wrong.
Example:
Me: Wow this pizza is really good!
Aubrey: JINX BUY ME A COKE!
Me: *Shakes head*
At any rate, Emma just turned around, looked at me and yelled, “Butter my buns and call me a wiener!”
Me: It’s biscuit.
Emma: What?
Me: It’s butter my buns and call me a BISCUIT!
Emma: Oh…
Emma Said: My Weiner
Last night I was tickling Emma when she yelled, “OW! I HURT MY WIENER!”
I snorted and said, “Emma, you don’t have a wiener… “
“Oh…well. I hurt my monkey…”
I have no words. Where does she get this stuff? I assure you she hasn’t learned this stuff at home.
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