- Part 11

Aubrey Said: Sniffing Glue

May 9, 2013 by Robin

While I was drying Aubrey’s hair last night she randomly said, “Did you know that sniffing gas is bad for you? Hmmmm? Did you know that Momma?”

Me: I did. How did you learn that? (Concerned face. What are the kids talking about these days??)

Aubrey: Shuggie told me. Sniffing gas and glue is bad for your brain…. that’s what she said.

(Thanks Mom. I’m not sure how this came up.)

Aubrey: Abby (her cousin) had told me that part about the gas before but I wasn’t sure if it was true or not.

Me: It is true but why did Abby tell you that?

(Fingers crossed that they weren’t sniffing something.)

Aubrey: I don’t know she just said that it was maybe bad for your brain?

Me: Ok. Why were you and Shuggie talking about it?

Aubrey: I don’t know… but I worry about Grammie… (Zeb’s mom, also the head queen of The Farm People.)

Me: Why?

Aubrey: ‘Cause she’s always driving the four-wheeler and the lawn mower outside! Do you think she smells gas all the time? Do you think she has cells left?

I was laughing so hard I had to put the hair dryer down, tears were streaming down my cheeks and I said, “Yes! Grammie has plenty of brain cells left I promise!!”

Aubrey: I hope it’s not just one.

Bless it. Grammie– I know you have more than one brain cell!

My Creative Process… A Vlog

April 30, 2013 by Robin

Not a great vlog, but alas… I give the people what they ask for. Even if my hair and face look heinous.

That’s the trailer for Lost in Living, the documentary I talk about in my vlog. LIL is not as boring as my vlog. I promise. Like Lost in Living on Facebook for more information!

Random Rant Regarding Instagram & A Story About My Dog

April 28, 2013 by Robin

I know what you are thinking… you are all, WHAT THE HAIL has happened to my dear, sweet, friend Robin who used to only write about hilarious things her children said and poop?? WHO is this woman who is now writing about yoga and gardening??? When is she going to get BACK in the bed and watch more Netflix so I can feel better about myself?

Well– just so you don’t worry about me too much– I watched an entire season of The Real World on Hulu this week. First I was stuck at home because Sadie was sick. I wasn’t feeling very good on Friday and was trying to show my mother how to use our new thermometer on Sadie, but she wouldn’t stand still. She knew if she was running a fever then she had to take medicine, so I took my own temp just to show Shuggie how it worked and realized I was running fever. #winning

I wasn’t sad about this at all– I got back in the bed and finished up The Real World while Sadie slept curled up next to me.

In other news Aubrey would like for me to announce to the world that she is “getting to that age that she doesn’t want me to talk about her or take her pictures anymore.” This happened after I posted a picture of her (with her permission) on Instagram then she went to school and people said something to her about it. I’d like to know who lets their second grader get on Instagram?? Especially my Instagram, seeing as how my target audience is NOT eight-year-olds.

Regardless, I will respect her requests because she is my daughter and I love her and want her to feel like she has privacy. It would HELP if people didn’t talk to her about what I write but I can’t control that, so– just know that I realize I have three children, but Sadie is the only one wanting to strike a pose these days. AND if I can figure out how to ban anyone under eighteen from my Instagram feed I’m totes going to do it.

In other news, Zebulicious was working on our vegetable garden this weekend as I caught up with The Real World: Virgin Islands. He planted tomatoes and cucumbers, rattlesnake beans, and a bunch of other stuff. As you may or may not know, our dog, Moses (aka the only dog I’ve ever liked) can occasionally be a pain in the ass. I don’t particualarly care when he tears stuff up because no one has broken into our cars since we got him. In fact, the UPS man and pizza delivery peeps won’t even step into our driveway because he goes nuts when he sees them. Which makes me laugh because if they walked up to them he would probably just lay down and roll over for them to scratch his belly but his bark is pretty ferocious and I LOVE it. (I say probably, but MAYHAPS he would rip your head off. I wouldn’t risk it if I were a creepy type person.) Zeb and I both travel a lot and I like having Moses outside to scare the crap out of anyone who might want to step on my property.

At any rate, this morning, Zebulicious went outside and came back in cracking up.

Zeb: Moses tried to plant tomatoes last night.

Me: Whaaa?

Zeb: The dang dog tried to plant tomatoes. Come look.

So I did. Y’all!! Bless his sweet little baby head. That dog dug a big ole hole, drug the tomato plants that Zeb hadn’t planted yet, into the hole, the WRAPPED landscaping fabric around it!! I can just hear his little doggy thoughts:

My Daddy is gonna be so proud of me! Imma do it just like he did then he is gonna be so happy!! He’s gonna pet me and play with me!

Did I just edit a photo to include a thought bubble for my dog? Yes, I did.

Did I just refer to Zebulicious as Moses’ “Daddy”? Yup.

Did I just write actual DIALOG for my dog as if he were speaking????? Again, yes. Yes, I did.

I’d tell you what in the world has happened to me but I caught myself riding my bike with a yoga mat strapped to my back the other day, right before I went to the health food store to buy a case of Kombucha, so I can’t say that I rightly know.

What have you been up to??

Hey Look! I’m A Real Gardener!

April 26, 2013 by Robin

I am super excited to team up with the *Home Depot to write this series of posts on fixing up my yard, ‘cuz I couldn’t have done it by myself! This is a sponsored post…

Normally when I say “we” worked in the yard, I mean, my husband, Zeb, worked in the yard while I sat in the shade and nodded my agreement at any questions he asked.

I think his tractor’s sexy.

But this year after teaming up with Home Depot to #DigIn to my Thriller, Filler, Spiller project, I haven’t been able to stop planting things.

Pretty!! I did that! (And they are still alive!)

After yoga and a quick trip to the store on Saturday I came home with a carload of gardening supplies, a few bales of pine straw for mulching, rosemary, cilantro and basil— for planting and eating.

Drawn by the strange site of their mother, elbow deep in dirt, my children flocked to my side in amazement.

“Momma, WHAT are you doing?” Emma, my six-year-old asked.

“Planting herbs to cook with,” I explained. “Close your eyes and smell this then tell me what it reminds you of,”I held the sweet basil up to her nose and she inhaled.

“Pizza!” She yelled.

Aubrey, Sadie and our honorary O’Bryant, Elizabeth, all sniffed and agreed— basil smells like pizza, rosemary smells like chicken, and cilantro smells like soap!

Sadie, my four-year-old, helped me plant zinnia seeds along the fence in our backyard. We laid on the dirt and I handed her the seeds one by one. I hope I never forget the way her fat little finger looked— fingernail bit down to the quick, dirt covering her hands, as she carefully poked each seed into the ground and asked, “Like dis Momma?”

“Yep, just like that.”

Sadie decided to take a nap & wait for the seeds to grow…

In the late afternoon Sadie and I stole a quilt from the house and carried it to the shade of the barn in our backyard. I was hoping she might fall asleep after an action packed weekend, instead we ended up playing I-Spy where she beat me fair and square.

Sadie’s I-Spy game face.

Sadie decided she needed a snack and as she walked to the house I stretched out on the quilt. I closed my eyes and took a deep breath of the cool breeze blowing off the river. I marveled in the perfect weather and the split second of time that is Springtime in Mississippi before the mosquitos start swarming.

I was still stretched out with my eyes closed when Sadie came back. Before I could roll over and open my eyes she whispered loudly, “Shhhhh! Momma’s sweepin!” She folded the edge of the blanket over my legs, kissed my sweaty forehead and patted my grimy hands. “Shhhh! No Moses!” She scolded our dog. “Momma’s asweep!”

I wondered how long she’d let me lay there and before I even finished the thought she was tapping me on the forehead, “Hey, will you open dis? It’s twicky.” She asked, passing me her granola bar.

That evening, once everyone was scrubbed clean and tucked in their beds, I realized why my husband isn’t capable of keeping his eyes open once his head hits the pillow. The best planting I did all day is when I planted my butt in my own bed and fell asleep, a little sunkissed and tired in the best way possible.

It’s home improvement time, and The Home Depot has everything you need to #DigIn for Spring. No matter what projects you want to tackle, they have great values on all you need. They’re ready to help you with renovation ideas and expert advice, too.

Get over $300 in email exclusive savings each year, sneak peeks on new products, monthly lawn & garden ideas for your region and access to The Home Depot’s gardening experts. Click here to join the world’s largest garden community today! Or go to http://gardenclub.homedepot.com/ to see some of the many benefits of membership.

This is a sponsored post written by me on behalf of The Home Depot.

Thriller, Filler, Spiller: My Front Porch Makeover

April 22, 2013 by Robin

I am super excited to team up with the *Home Depot to write this series of posts on fixing up my yard, ‘cuz I couldn’t have done it by myself! This is a sponsored post…

After successfully navigating the Home Depot with lots of help from Lucy and Sister Wife, I made it home with my plants, two new pots and potting soil. It was time to #DigIn to my Thriller, Filler, Spiller project!

Normally when I say “we” worked in the yard, I mean, my husband, Zeb, worked in the yard while I sat in the shade and nodded my agreement at any questions he asked. I was planning on doing this project all by myself but, drawn by the strange site of their mother, elbow deep in dirt, my children flocked to my side in amazement and begged to help. We flung potting soil all over the place as we filled our new pots with Impatiens, ferns and sweet potato vines!

Pants are optional for gardening at our house. Big hats are required!

In less than thirty minutes my front door went from drab and depressing to bursting with color. Look at all the hangy, pointy, pretty things!

Pointy, hangy AND pretty!

I’m so glad I didn’t sit back and let my husband do the work on this because I would have missed out on sweet time spent with Aubrey, Emma and Sadie! In addition, I now feel like a real gardener because it’s been almost two weeks and all my plants are still alive!! I had some extra plants leftover and found some old pots in my husband’s shed and went ahead and filled them up too.

BEFORE

AFTER

If you are looking to spruce up your front door, or have a backyard project in mind, DON’T be intimidated! Go to your Home Depot and use my illustrated guide to show the Garden Associate what you want to do! You can even login from home and ask an expert! All you need to know is if you have sun or shade and how much money you want to spend. Get your kids involved, get outside and #DigIn!

This is a sponsored post written by me on behalf of The Home Depot.

Sadie on Steroids, Pretending to be Me (A video)

April 20, 2013 by Robin

I can’t even… y’all. This kid– Sadie is funny on any given day. Sadie on actual steroids? Is Sadie on steroids… please enjoy.

#Ad Home Depot Makes Gardening Easy #DigIn

April 20, 2013 by Robin

I am super excited to team up with the *Home Depot to write this series of posts on fixing up my yard, ‘cuz I couldn’t have done it by myself! This is a sponsored post….

*(I am truly heartbroken for this country, the city of Boston & for the hundreds of people injured or killed in Texas– normally I maintain radio silence when tragedy strikes our nation, out of respect. And yet this time, while I grieve, pray & hope with the rest of our nation, I have signed contracts that obligate me to continue working. I have deadlines to meet. I never want to appear flippant when tragedy strikes, so just know that I am praying and continuing to do my job, just like you probably are. Much love! -Robin)

So Sister Wife and I found ourselves with an entire day without kids and headed to Madison, MS to Home Depot to work on my “Thriller, Filler, Spiller” planter project. I was really glad Lizzie was with me because as I mentioned, she is in two garden clubs and throws around words like “bed line, raised bed, full sun, partial shade, and potting soil,” with meaning. She even has her own electric hedge clippers and isn’t afraid to use them.

I am VERY afraid to use them because I’ve met me.

Because I know nothing about plants and/or gardening, I was glad she was with me as my security blanket. I know so little I don’t even know how to form actual questions about what I need or want. By myself I was afraid the conversation would go something like this…

Garden Associate: Do you need help?

Me: Yes. Plants.

GA: What kind of plants?

Me: Umm. Green. Pretty. Flower. Hangy???? Pot. And pointy!

GA: Have you had a stroke? Do you know your name?

I was anxious… but that was before I met Lucy!

Lucy spotted me and Wifey as soon as we walked in the door and came to see how she could help. I explained that I wanted planters by my front door but had no idea how or what to do. I did NOT tell Lucy that I was blogging for Home Depot about the project so I can only assume that she is always this sweet, helpful and not at all intimidating. She wandered through the plants with us for a good half an hour discussing options.

Things I wanted: color, something hangy, something tall and pointy, something green. Yep. That’s what I said.

Lucy was fluent in garden moron and helped us pick out two really pretty ferns (green, tall AND pointy), green and purple sweet potato vines (hangy), and hot pink impatiens (color and pretty)! I found some large black iron pots and grabbed a bag of potting soil and was ready to go.

No person nor plant was harmed in the steering of this cart.

Lucy had gone to help another customer but saw us loading the car as we were leaving and brought her tiny self over and helped us load the car, which is when I told her I was writing this up for Home Depot!

This is a sponsored post written by me on behalf of The Home Depot.