Day 1: Remove old crusty nail polish from eight toes, leftover from the last time you had a “real” pedicure (probably about the time your last child was born…or the last time you had to have your feet in stirrups.) Break up a fight between the kids, cook dinner, feed the baby, and clean the kitchen. Take a shower, realize you never finished taking off your polish, remove nail polish from remaining 2 toes. Clip 3 toenails, put your 4-year-old back in the bed, get water 3 times for your 2-year-old until the ice to water ratio is exactly right and you finally get the cup she wanted, feed the baby. Collapse in the bed due to exhaustion.
Day 2: Wake up at 4am, feed the baby. Get back in bed for a few hours. Get up again at 6:30, get dressed, put on makeup. Finish clipping toenails and possibly filing them. Make lunches, and breakfast, take your kids to school. Run errands, feed the baby, clean house, pick kids up, put kids down for naps, feed the baby. Apply base coat. Collapse in the bed due to exhaustion. Get up cook dinner, clean kitchen, bath time, feed baby, bed time. You got it, collapse in bed due to exhaustion.
Day 3: Congratulations, today you get to apply your first coat of color. To 6 toes, until your 4–year-old catches you and demands a mani/pedi…do laundry, feed the baby, fold and put away. Lunch. Feed the Baby. Naps. Feed the Baby. Dinner. Collapse in the bed.
Day 4: Feed the baby, make breakfast, make lunches. Take the kids to school. Go to the grocery store, put up groceries. Come home and feed the baby, clean the bathrooms and apply a second coat of color. Pick the kids up, put them down for naps. And collapse in the bed.
Day 5: If there is any nail polish left on your toes, you may now apply your top coat. If not, you get to start over. Isn’t amazing that something you can pay to have done in 30 minutes, takes a minimum of 5 days to do at home?
